This post has been sitting in my mental in-pile for a over a week now and will now seem long over due. Last Friday, the 8th of February a great event in the world of gaming occurred, LANdersonshatch II. You see we were given the day off college due to the fact that open evening was the night before and it gave the teachers the chance to have a lie in. So in the early hours of Friday morning whilst partaking in some Halo 3, an idea was formed. This was the second LAN party event to be held by my good friend Josh, AKA Andersonshatch. (Although the first event didn’t actually have a name and last weeks event didn’t even have a name until we were in Browne’s car on the way to Josh’s.)

The day started off with a huge revelation to me…
My bag is designed for LAN parties.
The dimension of my bag almost exactly equal the dimensions of an Xbox360 + accessories (Power brick included), this meant I had enough room for all my essential gaming bits, yet my Xbox360 was safe and snug. When we initially arrived at Josh’s house it was just me, him and Browne there. I have been to Josh’s many times now, but each time I go it is more and more apparent that his house is a geek’s paradise and is the ideal place to host a LAN party. Gaming commenced with Gears of War and while Browne and Josh played in the living room I was in the cinema/gaming room and we kept in tough with each other via phones that Josh had set up for conference call, whilst having music played into both rooms from Josh’s computer.

After I P0wn3d on Gears we went into Josh’s beautiful garden and partook in some trampolining, this was actually my first time on a trampoline which I didn’t think was that big of a deal but Josh and Matt clearly did. After mucking about on the trampoline for a while and breaking every safety regulation for use on the trampoline, the Babb-mobile showed up containing both Babbage himself and Twatwell (Complete with packed lunch prepaired by his girlfriend). With the arrival of these two we got on to doing what we do best, playing Halo. However as a consequence of us doing this we have to put up with what Maxwell doing what he does best, being a complete and utter twat.

For the next few hours time was spent trampolining, getting my arse handed by Browne on guitar hero, trampolining, Babb enraging my girlfriend, trampolining and the epic last level of Halo:CE oh yes and eating pizza. Maxwell most likely regretted moaning about the bit of meat that had fallen on to his slice of pizza due to the mocking from us that pursued about every vegetable on our slices of pizza. Then it came time for Maxwell to leave and this was met with rejoicing and merriment. That sounds a bit harsh but the best parts of the evening did all happen after he departed.

The hilarity really started when Josh introduced us to the speech recognition system on his laptop. At first we were amazed by this brilliant piece of technology, then we realised it can’t understand jack-shit. So we just talked away at it and saw what interesting sentences it could make up. It seems to have particular problems with the word “Batman”, Browne has a particularly dodgy looking video of me after half an hour or so on the laptop. Then after Babb and myself were prohibited from the use of the speech recognition system, we went on to play Crysis across 2 laptops. While seeing the amazing graphics of Crysis on Josh’s laptop and some, erm, interesting graphics on Browne’s Josh was bestowed with an idea; Laptop + Crysis + VGA cable + 50″ Plasma HDTV = Sheer Awesomeness

Amazingly purty is all I have to say on the matter. We finished off the evening rather lazily watching Browne play through portal and gulp down Penguins. Then we journeyed home playing music loudly in Browne’s car just to stop him falling asleep. For a LAN party very little gaming actually occurred but regardless it was one of the greatest days I have had, I eagerly anticipate LANdersonshatch III.

P.S. BTW Babb Laura says she is going too punch you next time she sees you, be careful my friend.

I haven’t been in to the whole blogging thing as much lately which has lead to some rather naff posts as of late. I am hoping I can redeem myself and bring this blog up to manic depressive-humorous standards. Right now is the part I commence with talking about the occurrences in the life of Clarky…

Exams are over, huzzah! Coursework commences, balls! I am already lagging behind on my coursework and I have only had most of it a week, I feel so proud. The computing coursework is rather interesting, the business coursework is rather not. My 18th came and went marvelously, seems ages ago now. Went out and got rather drunk to commemorate the event, was coping rather well till Max made me down a double shot of absinthe. I remember shortly after drinking that going down Staines High Street head-banging to Creeping Death by Metallica. Good times were had by all.

Oh yer btw, WTF has happened to you guys. Today was the first time I have had break with you lot in ages and the group seems to have disbanded in my absence. Matt and Sara are MIA, (although I got an explanation for that from her blog) Ben is randomly running up Egham High Street joining in attacks on me from Tom Rush and Maxwell hangs around with the “Wankers”. (admittedly he wasn’t today) It’s all gone to pot, get it sorted people.

Now on to some more shocking news that is going to probably surprise some of my more devoted readers, this will probably even come as a shock to any random unknowns that have read my previous posts. Despite all my Rambling about her, I am back together with Laura. To be honest it seems shocking to me as well and I am the one that is going out with her. I know some of you are going to be against it and that is what makes you awesome friends because I know you are only looking out for me, I am however going to go ahead with this and see what happens.

In my younger years Christmas would have started off at my house with my mum and at some point mid morning would have migrated over to my grandparents house for Christmas dinner, catching up with my great-uncle & great-aunties and general festive merriment. Now it is 2007, My Grandfather and one of my great-aunties passed on many years ago, then just a few months ago my remaining great-auntie and great-uncle have also passed away, my Nan is still with us though thankfully, in the physical sense anyway but is currently incarcerated in a building that seems to have been created by the same architect that came up with the hotel in the shinning. (I’ll get back to that later) So this Christmas around the dinner table will sit; me and my mother. You have no idea how pathetic it seems when it comes to cracker pulling.

Today after being released from Strodes till I am forced to return on the 6th of January, a few things happened. First thing to happen was I vowed to have my revenge upon David-Fucking-Ginger-Fucktard-Faulkner, he informed my business teacher that we had to attend her lesson even though she thought the college day finished before her lesson began, then he fucks off home why we go to business. After this a few of my friends and I went to relax and de-stress in the best way there is… with beer. Then after this we went had a meal and I had many laughs and a bloody good day, despite Maxwell being a right annoying and rude prick at times. (I am truly amazed it has taken this long for me to complain about him in some way in my blog)

Then I had to leave my friends as today my Nan got moved from hospital and into a new nursing home, so me and my Mum went to visit her and see how she was settling in. This place is without a doubt the most scariest place I have been in my life. It is the perfect seen for a horror film. It’s bleak and dark inside, it made me think of a hospital that could have been last used in the 1930′s, and I suppose considering the buildings current use it well could of been an old hospital. The corridors in this building seem to stretch out forever without an end ever coming into site and as you walk down these endless corridors you are greeted with a variety of moans and groans as you pass various doors. At one stage on our expedition through the corridors of the Nursing Home we passed a kitchen and I looked through the door and there is a chef standing there staring at me with a huge-fuck-off knife in his hands. This did not help with me finding this place bloody terrifying. What also didn’t help that in half of the rooms patients seemed to be strapped to the bed and in every room there are contraptions (which I can only assume are as close to chains as NHS inspectors allow) hanging from the ceiling. I later found out these contraptions are because the nurses aren’t allowed to lift patients out of bed as it is against health and safety. Lazy Fucks.